So often we hear about setting healthy boundaries and that we need to say “no” when necessary. And I have learned through painful experience that this principle is true. But it is also true that for our emotional health, it is important that we say yes as often as possible!”
Not just “yes” in a general say “yes to life, kind of way,” but to specific, actual, possibly time-consuming requests.
It’s not possible to do all we desire in a day and we have to choose wisely how to use our limited time, resources and energy. But it is amazing to experience the personal boost to our spirits and esteem when we say yes as often as possible!
For example:
- My daughter is capable of getting herself up and out the door by 4:30 a.m. to join her high school group traveling to a national event out of State. I didn’t need to wake up with her, yet I knew she would appreciate saying goodbye and having those few moments with me to wish her well. That was a yes moment. I even drove her to the school to help relieve the pressure of all she needed to do. The result of strengthening a relationship far outweighs any lack of sleep or minor sacrifice on my part.
- I was ready to start on a work project and though my husband often gets his own lunch, I offered to make a sandwich for him. That was a yes moment. And instead of the bare basics I chose to say “yes” to making his sandwich with all the extras, just because I know he likes them and it was a simple way to serve.
- Knowing a client was struggling more than usual, I chose to give the extra time and attention needed, even though it cut into my personal plans. That was another “yes” moment.
None of these was a huge investment of time, and there are times when they may not have been the thing to do, but in these moments, the benefit of saying yes, yielded far greater results than saying no, and fearfully clinging to boundaries afraid they might be crossed.
Saying ‘yes’ is not only a way to serve and lift others but is a sure-fire way to lift and strengthen oneself!
The study titled, “The Neurobiology of Giving Versus Receiving Support: The Role of Stress-Related and Social Reward-Related Neural Activity,” by Tristen Inagaki and Naomi Eisenberger, stated that altruism and giving support have multiple health benefits.
Specific areas of the brain associated with stress, reward and caregiving are affected positively when supporting others.
Research has shown that as you help others you are also helping yourself.
Some benefits of helping others include:
- Helps you live longer.
- Makes you happy and gives a sense of purpose and satisfaction.
- Lessens chronic pain.
- Lowers blood pressure.
- Promotes positive behaviors.
What a win-win situation for all!
Are there opportunities for you to say yes today?
Invite them in and be ready to experience improved health, happiness and not only increase your ability to meet others’ needs but your own as well!
Much love,
